slack until the boredoom is killing me. -_-
the main purpose for getting an intern this sem was to drown myself in drudgery and monotony, had imagined the pleasure of doing mindless, repetitive work that would numb whatever nonsensical thoughts that are in my brain, suppressed during the exams. however, this aimlessness during work is doing nothing to help at all.
i think im emotionally S-M, fetish for thinking about unhappy stuff so that i can never escape from the emotional quicksand.
longing to meetup with you all again!
im obsessed abt her, haha until ting and wen get so exasperated whenever they see me visiting her blog. seriously, i dont know why either. there's this insatiable desire to be better than her, she's my perverse motivation for trying to lose weight [ to no avail] , she's a source for my feelings of inferiority, conflicted with this guilt and sense of responsibility for her clubbing, trying out smoking, well basically for becoming into some "bad girl" la. practically behaving like her stalker la! but i know darren doesnt even care about her now, so theoretically, why should i bother too? but like i said, its an obsession.
just a post to iron out some thoughts.
whatever you want here